Happy Thanksgiving!

Our little turkey's first Thanksgiving! May you and your families have as blessed a holiday as Thomas, Tim and I.


[Click to enlarge]

Thomas' Medical Updates

We have set up a CarePages account for our new son, Thomas Emery Daily. It is a web site supported by the hospital that allows you to update your friends and family with the current medical status of a patient. Thomas' own CarePage can be found at this link: Thomas' CarePage

You will have to register (for free), and it allows you to receive notice by email when an update has been posted. So far, I've just updated Sunday's info, I will be posting an update from yesterday shortly.

Thank you all for your love, support, and prayers. I believe it has made a world of difference in how Thomas is doing. And it means so much to us.

Susan & Tim

Announcing...

We would like to introduce you to our son, Thomas Emery Daily, who was born on Saturday, 22 November 2008, at 2:12 a.m.

Thomas' name came about in interesting ways. Back on September 12th, I had a dream. Mary Anne, Tim's mother, was pushing an old fashioned baby carriage, with Tim walking beside her. They approached me, I believe I was laying in a hospital bed. Mary Anne asked me, "Would you like to meet baby Tom?" I looked up at Tim and said, "That isn't one of our name choices!" [It wasn't.] And he said sheepishly, "It was in the spirit of the moment." Tom is the name of Tim's father.

Then in October, we were at a Halloween party. Other guests were interested in knowing gender, names, due dates, etc. but all we could tell them was that the baby was due to be born on Thanksgiving Day. One of the women said, "You should name your baby Tom, then, if it is a boy." She was referring to a Tom Turkey, but at first I didn't get that. I just was stunned she picked the name Tom. Within two days, a second person also said we should name the baby Tom if it was a boy.

We still did not change our name list, where we had the name Thomas as one of the middle name options. Once, in early November, Tim and I sat at the dinner table and pulled out our name list and went through them again. We were leaning heavily towards the name Nolan Michael for a boy. But nothing seemed exactly right. When people would ask if we had picked a name, yet, I would say we had a list of six boys' and six girls' names, but none were anything we absolutely loved. We just felt we had to meet baby.

The week our son was born, though, I began to think about that name Thomas. At the bottom of our list of names, I scribbled down "Thomas Emery" even though Emery had never been one of our choices, either. (It had been nixed during our initial collaboration.)

So on Saturday morning, when someone in the delivery room announced, "It's a boy!" (I never did see him naked until I was looking at photos that night by myself), we knew the count was on to get him named. After I sent out the first birth announcement, we were soon inundated with name options. Two of them included the name Thomas. The funniest one was "Thomas Brady Daily" suggested by Tim's former boss, Rich, an avid Patriots fan. When Tim told me the name en route to see Thomas at Children's Mercy on Saturday afternoon, I thought, how interesting, he picked the name Thomas. I did not make the connection to the quarterback's name being Tom Brady!

As Tim and I sat alone with our son, I asked, "So what are you thinking of for his name?" Tim told me he had asked our boy what name to call him when he was alone with him in the early morning hours. But that since I "did all the work", I should name him. But I smiled and said, "No, he is our son. Let's decide together." And he said he liked the name Thomas. We had not talked yet about naming him that, so it was a very good moment. I told Tim that I agreed, and our son had a first name.

The middle name was a little trickier. I told Tim I really liked a family name, Emery, but that I also was debating using the name Edmund. We had really wanted to use Michael, but that just didn't seem to go, now. A fourth choice we tossed around was Murphy. So two Ms and two Es (T.M.D. or T.E.D.). So I said to Tim that I would call my brother Paul that night and find out how he felt about his middle name, which is Emery.

Paul told me that while growing up, he didn't like it, especially since he didn't even know "who" Emery was! But that he had grown used to it now. When I told him the choices, he said he liked the flow of Thomas Emery better than Thomas Edmund, even though he thought Edmund had a more tangible link to our family. (Edmund is my father's father's name.) Our first link into the Emery family, which settled in America in 1635, is my father's great grandmother, "Grammy Kate", or Katherine Imogene (Emery) Stevens (photo taken c. 1925). My dad's mother Olive had a brother named Clayton Emery Buck, we knew him as "Uncle Clayt" growing up. Olive then chose the name Emery for the middle name of her son, my father's brother, David Emery Cullivan. My dad continued the tradition and named his eldest son Paul Emery, this is my brother. There is a free downloadable copy of the Emery genealogical history online at Google Books: Genealogical Records of Descendants of John and Anthony Emery, of Newbury, Mass. 1590-1890.

The name Thomas might seem to point most obviously to Tim's father, Thomas. But since I am a genealogist, what I find really neat about it is that Thomas is the name of the father of the first Daily immigrant to America, Peter Daily, who arrived in Boston, MA about 1835. A verbal history by one of Peter's granddaughters stated the following: "Peter Dailey was born in County Longford, Ireland, in the year 1804. He was the son of Thomas Dailey, who was a schoolteacher, and his second wife, name unknown. Thomas Dailey and his first wife had five sons and they were grown men when Thomas remarried after the death of his first wife. Peter was their only son and Thomas died when Peter was two years old." Peter's son John named one of his twin sons Thomas. Tim's father, Tom, was named for this man, his grandfather (see photo, taken in Indiana in 1909). The name Thomas means "twin" in Greek. Our little Thomas could have been a twin also, as he was one of two embryos that we transferred back in March. I like that little twist to the meaning behind his name, too. So Tom's grandson was named for him, just as he had been named for his grandfather. Another cute little fact is that our baby son now has both of my brothers' middle names! (My brother Brian is named Brian Thomas.)

Sorry for the long dissertation on his name, but as a genealogist, I couldn't resist!

Our baby boy was born today!

I gave birth to our baby boy at 2:12 this morning, November 22, after more than 24 hours of labor. Baby was 7 lbs. 11 oz, 21.5" long, with a full head of hair! He was rated with an impressive APGAR score of 9. (The neonatologist was impressed. He said, "we don't give those away.") He has a nice round face, good reflexes, a hefty cry, very long fingers and toes, and large feet. We have not named the baby yet, but plan to do so by tomorrow (Sunday).

[Remember to click on each picture to see a larger version.]

Here is a picture of Susan holding the baby for the first time:

Here is a picture of baby in the NICU bassinet, showing his long feet:


Baby was prepared for transport to the children's hospital within two hours in this bassinet:


The transport team brought baby to mom's room for her to hold. Here they are joined by daddy Tim and grandma Mary Anne:

After Susan was brought to the Mother/Baby unit and her new room, Tim left for the children's hospital to be with baby. This was about 6 a.m. At the new hospital NICU, Tim took this pic of baby in his bassinet:

After a long day with many phone calls, Tim and Mary Anne returned to the birthing hospital to pick up Susan and return to the children's hospital to visit with baby. Here is Susan holding the baby on her lap around 6 p.m., still on his birthday:

I'll post a full report at a later time, but wanted to get these pictures out to share with all our friends and family.

Is this the day?

I woke up at 1:30 this morning with uncomfortable contractions (which I will call surges). I did feel a small amount of watery discharge, I think, but I don't know what it was. I went back to bed and had two more surges, and got up at 1:40. I noticed some red blood tinged discharge, sorry if this is TMI! I started timing the surges, and they were about five minutes apart, lasting between 1 minute 15 seconds and two minutes. When they come on, my pelvic muscles and lower back ache.

At 3:00 a.m. I woke Tim up to tell him I had been having strong surges for an hour and a half. We talked about what else we should do, and finally agreed to call Lynn, even though it was early in the morning. So I did, and we talked for a bit. She said she would come over if I felt I needed help with these surges, but since I didn't really think I did, I agreed I would call her when they went to four minutes apart and much stronger. Then Tim went and woke up Mary Anne, deciding rightly that she would want to be awake and know this was going on. Tim then made us both a fried egg on toast for breakfast.

During the surges, I sit on my yoga exercise ball, and swivel my hips and breathe deep. It helps relieve all the tension. When Tim touches me to give me goosebumps, it is amazing how the endorphins make all discomfort go away.

So I have been timing the surges with the help of a really neat web site called the Contraction Master. After a few hours at four and a half to five minutes apart, they then spread out to seven and eight minutes apart. So I wondered if this was just a false alarm. But then they returned to being about five minutes apart again. In the past hour, they have been anywhere from four to nine minutes apart. But they are very strong, so they must be doing something. Tim will stay home today, he can work from his PC here.

But please don't call us asking if we have had the baby yet! For all we know, I will be at home for 24 hours before needing to go into the hospital. If you get a call from our home number, it doesn't mean anything. If you get one from our cell phone, that should be a good sign! And we will call! And of course, I will try to update the blog as soon as I can.

Birth Plan

This is a copy of the birth plan that we have provided to the hospital's maternal unit. We will bring extra copies with us. The maternal care coordinator said there were two things that might be a problem: not getting the heparin lock (the inlet for an IV that they can place in your hand and it just stays there), and being allowed to eat or drink anything.

Susan and Tim – Birth Plan

We have written this birth plan with our ideal birthing situation in mind, knowing well that flexibility is an important factor in emergency situations. We are willing and eager to listen to opinions and discuss alternative options for the birth of a healthy baby should the need arise.

Our hope is to have a natural childbirth free of medications and interventions. Susan is planning to use the hypnobirthing method of relaxation during the birthing. She plans to spend the very early stages of labor at home with her family and her doula, Lynn Johnson. She then plans to be at St. Luke’s for the active stages and the birthing, accompanied by her husband, Tim, her doula, and her mother-in-law, Mary Anne Daily.

First Stage Labor
• Please do not offer me pain medications; I will ask for them if I want them.
• Intermittent monitoring via Doppler or external fetal monitoring is preferred.
• Please do not restrict my movement. I prefer to maintain mobility.
• Please do not administer an IV or heparin lock unless there is a clear medical indication that such is necessary.
• Please allow me to eat and drink to comfort if allowed.

Augmentation
• Please do not administer pitocin.
• Please do not artificially rupture membranes.
• Please allow first stage of prolonged length.
• I would prefer to walk to speed labor, and use other natural methods.

Second Stage (Pushing/Birth)
• Please do not perform an episiotomy; use compresses & positioning. I prefer to tear.
• Please delay cord clamping & cutting.
• We would prefer for Tim to cut the cord.
• We would like to bank the cord blood privately and will have the kit available.
• Please encourage me to begin pushing only when my body tells me to.
• Please do not restrict my choice of birthing position.
• Please provide squat bar for birthing bed and birthing ball for laboring.
• Please allow second stage of prolonged length.
• Please allow for Susan to eat immediately after birth if desired.

Baby Care:
• If baby is not in distress, please allow for immediate skin-to-skin contact and breastfeeding for 5 to 10 minutes; conduct newborn assessment on Susan’s chest if necessary.
• IV to be administered in baby on a warming bed rolled next to Susan.
• Please do not provide formula or glucose water; I would like to exclusively breastfeed. If tube, bottle or dropper-feeding required, please use Susan’s breastmilk.
• When baby is transported to another facility, please discharge Susan as soon as possible.


Unexpected Events

Cesarean Birth
• Spinal/epidural anesthesia
• Tim present
• Please allow Tim to hold baby as soon as possible

Stillbirth/Newborn Death
• Please allow Susan & Tim to see and hold baby as often and for as long as desired.
• We wish to obtain mementos such as photographs, locks of hair, footprints.
• Please allow Susan to recover in a room separate from postpartum unit and provide early discharge.
• Please offer spiritual and grief counseling.
• Please provide information regarding any support group.

CHD Awareness video

Today, a friend passed on the link to the Kansas City CHD families web site, which I haven't looked at in quite a while: http://www.chdfamilies.org/. If you scroll down, you will see a video for "CHD awareness 08" that you can click on to play. It is a little under 14 minutes long. I hope you have time to view it. Even I learned a little more about congenital heart defects. It is a homemade presentation.