Happy Thanksgiving!

Our little turkey's first Thanksgiving! May you and your families have as blessed a holiday as Thomas, Tim and I.


[Click to enlarge]

Thomas' Medical Updates

We have set up a CarePages account for our new son, Thomas Emery Daily. It is a web site supported by the hospital that allows you to update your friends and family with the current medical status of a patient. Thomas' own CarePage can be found at this link: Thomas' CarePage

You will have to register (for free), and it allows you to receive notice by email when an update has been posted. So far, I've just updated Sunday's info, I will be posting an update from yesterday shortly.

Thank you all for your love, support, and prayers. I believe it has made a world of difference in how Thomas is doing. And it means so much to us.

Susan & Tim

Announcing...

We would like to introduce you to our son, Thomas Emery Daily, who was born on Saturday, 22 November 2008, at 2:12 a.m.

Thomas' name came about in interesting ways. Back on September 12th, I had a dream. Mary Anne, Tim's mother, was pushing an old fashioned baby carriage, with Tim walking beside her. They approached me, I believe I was laying in a hospital bed. Mary Anne asked me, "Would you like to meet baby Tom?" I looked up at Tim and said, "That isn't one of our name choices!" [It wasn't.] And he said sheepishly, "It was in the spirit of the moment." Tom is the name of Tim's father.

Then in October, we were at a Halloween party. Other guests were interested in knowing gender, names, due dates, etc. but all we could tell them was that the baby was due to be born on Thanksgiving Day. One of the women said, "You should name your baby Tom, then, if it is a boy." She was referring to a Tom Turkey, but at first I didn't get that. I just was stunned she picked the name Tom. Within two days, a second person also said we should name the baby Tom if it was a boy.

We still did not change our name list, where we had the name Thomas as one of the middle name options. Once, in early November, Tim and I sat at the dinner table and pulled out our name list and went through them again. We were leaning heavily towards the name Nolan Michael for a boy. But nothing seemed exactly right. When people would ask if we had picked a name, yet, I would say we had a list of six boys' and six girls' names, but none were anything we absolutely loved. We just felt we had to meet baby.

The week our son was born, though, I began to think about that name Thomas. At the bottom of our list of names, I scribbled down "Thomas Emery" even though Emery had never been one of our choices, either. (It had been nixed during our initial collaboration.)

So on Saturday morning, when someone in the delivery room announced, "It's a boy!" (I never did see him naked until I was looking at photos that night by myself), we knew the count was on to get him named. After I sent out the first birth announcement, we were soon inundated with name options. Two of them included the name Thomas. The funniest one was "Thomas Brady Daily" suggested by Tim's former boss, Rich, an avid Patriots fan. When Tim told me the name en route to see Thomas at Children's Mercy on Saturday afternoon, I thought, how interesting, he picked the name Thomas. I did not make the connection to the quarterback's name being Tom Brady!

As Tim and I sat alone with our son, I asked, "So what are you thinking of for his name?" Tim told me he had asked our boy what name to call him when he was alone with him in the early morning hours. But that since I "did all the work", I should name him. But I smiled and said, "No, he is our son. Let's decide together." And he said he liked the name Thomas. We had not talked yet about naming him that, so it was a very good moment. I told Tim that I agreed, and our son had a first name.

The middle name was a little trickier. I told Tim I really liked a family name, Emery, but that I also was debating using the name Edmund. We had really wanted to use Michael, but that just didn't seem to go, now. A fourth choice we tossed around was Murphy. So two Ms and two Es (T.M.D. or T.E.D.). So I said to Tim that I would call my brother Paul that night and find out how he felt about his middle name, which is Emery.

Paul told me that while growing up, he didn't like it, especially since he didn't even know "who" Emery was! But that he had grown used to it now. When I told him the choices, he said he liked the flow of Thomas Emery better than Thomas Edmund, even though he thought Edmund had a more tangible link to our family. (Edmund is my father's father's name.) Our first link into the Emery family, which settled in America in 1635, is my father's great grandmother, "Grammy Kate", or Katherine Imogene (Emery) Stevens (photo taken c. 1925). My dad's mother Olive had a brother named Clayton Emery Buck, we knew him as "Uncle Clayt" growing up. Olive then chose the name Emery for the middle name of her son, my father's brother, David Emery Cullivan. My dad continued the tradition and named his eldest son Paul Emery, this is my brother. There is a free downloadable copy of the Emery genealogical history online at Google Books: Genealogical Records of Descendants of John and Anthony Emery, of Newbury, Mass. 1590-1890.

The name Thomas might seem to point most obviously to Tim's father, Thomas. But since I am a genealogist, what I find really neat about it is that Thomas is the name of the father of the first Daily immigrant to America, Peter Daily, who arrived in Boston, MA about 1835. A verbal history by one of Peter's granddaughters stated the following: "Peter Dailey was born in County Longford, Ireland, in the year 1804. He was the son of Thomas Dailey, who was a schoolteacher, and his second wife, name unknown. Thomas Dailey and his first wife had five sons and they were grown men when Thomas remarried after the death of his first wife. Peter was their only son and Thomas died when Peter was two years old." Peter's son John named one of his twin sons Thomas. Tim's father, Tom, was named for this man, his grandfather (see photo, taken in Indiana in 1909). The name Thomas means "twin" in Greek. Our little Thomas could have been a twin also, as he was one of two embryos that we transferred back in March. I like that little twist to the meaning behind his name, too. So Tom's grandson was named for him, just as he had been named for his grandfather. Another cute little fact is that our baby son now has both of my brothers' middle names! (My brother Brian is named Brian Thomas.)

Sorry for the long dissertation on his name, but as a genealogist, I couldn't resist!

Our baby boy was born today!

I gave birth to our baby boy at 2:12 this morning, November 22, after more than 24 hours of labor. Baby was 7 lbs. 11 oz, 21.5" long, with a full head of hair! He was rated with an impressive APGAR score of 9. (The neonatologist was impressed. He said, "we don't give those away.") He has a nice round face, good reflexes, a hefty cry, very long fingers and toes, and large feet. We have not named the baby yet, but plan to do so by tomorrow (Sunday).

[Remember to click on each picture to see a larger version.]

Here is a picture of Susan holding the baby for the first time:

Here is a picture of baby in the NICU bassinet, showing his long feet:


Baby was prepared for transport to the children's hospital within two hours in this bassinet:


The transport team brought baby to mom's room for her to hold. Here they are joined by daddy Tim and grandma Mary Anne:

After Susan was brought to the Mother/Baby unit and her new room, Tim left for the children's hospital to be with baby. This was about 6 a.m. At the new hospital NICU, Tim took this pic of baby in his bassinet:

After a long day with many phone calls, Tim and Mary Anne returned to the birthing hospital to pick up Susan and return to the children's hospital to visit with baby. Here is Susan holding the baby on her lap around 6 p.m., still on his birthday:

I'll post a full report at a later time, but wanted to get these pictures out to share with all our friends and family.

Is this the day?

I woke up at 1:30 this morning with uncomfortable contractions (which I will call surges). I did feel a small amount of watery discharge, I think, but I don't know what it was. I went back to bed and had two more surges, and got up at 1:40. I noticed some red blood tinged discharge, sorry if this is TMI! I started timing the surges, and they were about five minutes apart, lasting between 1 minute 15 seconds and two minutes. When they come on, my pelvic muscles and lower back ache.

At 3:00 a.m. I woke Tim up to tell him I had been having strong surges for an hour and a half. We talked about what else we should do, and finally agreed to call Lynn, even though it was early in the morning. So I did, and we talked for a bit. She said she would come over if I felt I needed help with these surges, but since I didn't really think I did, I agreed I would call her when they went to four minutes apart and much stronger. Then Tim went and woke up Mary Anne, deciding rightly that she would want to be awake and know this was going on. Tim then made us both a fried egg on toast for breakfast.

During the surges, I sit on my yoga exercise ball, and swivel my hips and breathe deep. It helps relieve all the tension. When Tim touches me to give me goosebumps, it is amazing how the endorphins make all discomfort go away.

So I have been timing the surges with the help of a really neat web site called the Contraction Master. After a few hours at four and a half to five minutes apart, they then spread out to seven and eight minutes apart. So I wondered if this was just a false alarm. But then they returned to being about five minutes apart again. In the past hour, they have been anywhere from four to nine minutes apart. But they are very strong, so they must be doing something. Tim will stay home today, he can work from his PC here.

But please don't call us asking if we have had the baby yet! For all we know, I will be at home for 24 hours before needing to go into the hospital. If you get a call from our home number, it doesn't mean anything. If you get one from our cell phone, that should be a good sign! And we will call! And of course, I will try to update the blog as soon as I can.

Birth Plan

This is a copy of the birth plan that we have provided to the hospital's maternal unit. We will bring extra copies with us. The maternal care coordinator said there were two things that might be a problem: not getting the heparin lock (the inlet for an IV that they can place in your hand and it just stays there), and being allowed to eat or drink anything.

Susan and Tim – Birth Plan

We have written this birth plan with our ideal birthing situation in mind, knowing well that flexibility is an important factor in emergency situations. We are willing and eager to listen to opinions and discuss alternative options for the birth of a healthy baby should the need arise.

Our hope is to have a natural childbirth free of medications and interventions. Susan is planning to use the hypnobirthing method of relaxation during the birthing. She plans to spend the very early stages of labor at home with her family and her doula, Lynn Johnson. She then plans to be at St. Luke’s for the active stages and the birthing, accompanied by her husband, Tim, her doula, and her mother-in-law, Mary Anne Daily.

First Stage Labor
• Please do not offer me pain medications; I will ask for them if I want them.
• Intermittent monitoring via Doppler or external fetal monitoring is preferred.
• Please do not restrict my movement. I prefer to maintain mobility.
• Please do not administer an IV or heparin lock unless there is a clear medical indication that such is necessary.
• Please allow me to eat and drink to comfort if allowed.

Augmentation
• Please do not administer pitocin.
• Please do not artificially rupture membranes.
• Please allow first stage of prolonged length.
• I would prefer to walk to speed labor, and use other natural methods.

Second Stage (Pushing/Birth)
• Please do not perform an episiotomy; use compresses & positioning. I prefer to tear.
• Please delay cord clamping & cutting.
• We would prefer for Tim to cut the cord.
• We would like to bank the cord blood privately and will have the kit available.
• Please encourage me to begin pushing only when my body tells me to.
• Please do not restrict my choice of birthing position.
• Please provide squat bar for birthing bed and birthing ball for laboring.
• Please allow second stage of prolonged length.
• Please allow for Susan to eat immediately after birth if desired.

Baby Care:
• If baby is not in distress, please allow for immediate skin-to-skin contact and breastfeeding for 5 to 10 minutes; conduct newborn assessment on Susan’s chest if necessary.
• IV to be administered in baby on a warming bed rolled next to Susan.
• Please do not provide formula or glucose water; I would like to exclusively breastfeed. If tube, bottle or dropper-feeding required, please use Susan’s breastmilk.
• When baby is transported to another facility, please discharge Susan as soon as possible.


Unexpected Events

Cesarean Birth
• Spinal/epidural anesthesia
• Tim present
• Please allow Tim to hold baby as soon as possible

Stillbirth/Newborn Death
• Please allow Susan & Tim to see and hold baby as often and for as long as desired.
• We wish to obtain mementos such as photographs, locks of hair, footprints.
• Please allow Susan to recover in a room separate from postpartum unit and provide early discharge.
• Please offer spiritual and grief counseling.
• Please provide information regarding any support group.

CHD Awareness video

Today, a friend passed on the link to the Kansas City CHD families web site, which I haven't looked at in quite a while: http://www.chdfamilies.org/. If you scroll down, you will see a video for "CHD awareness 08" that you can click on to play. It is a little under 14 minutes long. I hope you have time to view it. Even I learned a little more about congenital heart defects. It is a homemade presentation.

Today's consult with the neonatologist

I finally got to have my consult with a NICU pediatrician, aka neonatologist, at the hospital where I am delivering.

So I asked about what it was that they would need to do with baby immediately after birth, if they would be whisking baby away within a minute, and would baby be getting more than an IV. And the doc said oh no, it would be more than a few minutes, so that was good. And he said, the IV was the only thing they anticipate doing, and will have the IV drip on the floor, in anticipation of baby's birth. So I asked if I could hold baby while they put in the IV, and he looked horrified! He said it was a pretty tricky procedure, it goes into baby's hand or foot. They need a stable surface. So he said, but we can wheel over the warming bassinet right next to you, so you can stay in contact with baby while we put in the IV!!!!!!! I was so thrilled to hear this! (Otherwise, they planned to do it in the nursery.)

I asked about arterial umbilical lines that another CHD mom had mentioned and he said they do not anticipate putting those in unless baby is VERY sick. He said it carries a high level of risk that they prefer not to put baby through unnecessarily. (They use the arterial line to measure blood gasses to make sure the baby is getting enough oxygen, not retaining too much CO2, not becoming acidotic from poor heart function, check electrolyte balances, etc.)

He did say this, though: the number one and worst side effect of prostaglandins (which is what the IV is for) is Apnea. Apnea is difficulty or cessation of breathing. He said if that does happen, then they will need to bring the baby to the NICU to intubate. He said that many babies don't have a problem with the prostaglandins, however.

So then I asked if baby didn't need the intubation, would they still intubate the baby prior to the children's hospital team taking baby by ambulance to their hospital, as I had heard that. And he said, no, they would not intubate a baby that didn't need it. So this was another huge thing to hear.

I did ask about keeping baby connected to the umbilical cord, if that would help baby to continue getting oxygen. He said I had to be careful with that. If baby is placed above the placenta, then blood will drain down out of baby, possibly leaving baby anemic. And if baby is below the placenta, baby could face being overwhelmed with blood, not a good thing. So I am thinking maybe about lying on my side after birth, so baby is about even with the placenta. I don't know, though. Since we are doing the cord blood thing, we will probably just go ahead and clamp the cord after the last pulses, and then I can do chest to chest (hoping) with baby.

I am just so happy to have had this talk. He said he would update the medical orders to indicate the IV placement in the OR. And I said I would update my birth plan to indicate this, too. We both agreed that if the situation is not ideal/healthy for baby, that all these plans get thrown out, and I can live with that.

In addition to the consult, I had my weekly prenatal office visit, fluid check, and biweekly NST. Unfortunately, I have not progressed much since last week, still just 50% effaced, and only fingertip dilated. She did say the cervix was a little softer. Baby is still doing well, passed the NST (which showed two contractions I had thought were baby stretching) with a heart rate of about 135 BPM, and the fluid level was 17.3 centimeters. My blood pressure was 109/65. One interesting thing the nurse practitioner showed us (Mary Anne was with me) was something floating in the amniotic fluid around baby. She said it was the baby's vernex, which is that white moisturizing/insulating layer found on all babies, which slowly disappears as baby gets closer to birth. It looked like snow floating in a snow globe.

My next prenatal appointment will be Monday, since the office is closed Thursday for the Thanksgiving holiday. If I still need one, I have another prenatal scheduled for December 1, and at that point I will be four days past my due date. Let's hope I have long since had the baby by then; the sooner baby is born, the sooner baby will be home for Christmas.

38 weeks - Prenatal appointment

On Thursday, November 13, I went in for my weekly prenatal appointment. My blood pressure was 104/74. Baby's fluid level was 13.9, so still a very good amount. Heartbeat was about 140 BPM. (Babies' heart rates are much faster than adults', and remain so for about the first year.) Baby was nice and active, and passed the nonstress test. I was offered an optional internal exam if I wanted to know how far along I have progressed, so I said yes. Nurse said I was 50% effaced, which is the measurement for the thinning of the cervix, and barely a fingertip dilated. She massaged the cervix to release prostaglandins to continue the progress of dilation. (Cervix will eventually dilate to 10 cm to allow baby's head to pass out of the uterus.) Baby's head is at -1 station, which is just above entering the birth canal. (Click on picture below to enlarge.)
I'm not sleeping as well these days, I get odd cramps in my knees, or I wake up and can't fall back asleep, thinking about my long to-do list! I did put a towel and piece of plastic under the sheet to protect the mattress in case my water breaks at night! So the plastic is a little warm, and that doesn't help either.

So the full moon came and went Thursday, and I didn't go into labor! But today, Tim's mom arrives for two and a half weeks, so I've had a little chat with baby that the middle of next week would be a great time to arrive! We are still waiting for delivery of the crib and dresser, and need to start organzing all the gifts we have received. In the past month, baby has received three lovely homemade gifts by mail: a cozy yellow flannel patchwork quilt from baby's paternal grandfather's cousin, a wonderful scalloped edged yellow and white crocheted blanket from baby's paternal grandmother's sister-in-law, and a beautiful cream knitted blanket from baby's maternal grandmother's cousin.

On a very sad note, Thursday was also the one year anniversary of the birth day of Josephine, my cousin's stillborn daughter. This has been on my mind a little bit, I still feel such grief for her parents.

Baby has dropped...

At my appointment last Thursday, November 6, my nurse practioner told me that baby's head appeared to be engaged. (This means baby's head is now within the pelvic bones.) On Monday night, Jodi, our hypnobirthing specialist, and Tim both agreed that it looked like baby had dropped down in position. I have noticed that my heartburn is much reduced, so there must indeed be less pressure up at the top. I am also feeling lots more cramping in the lower abdomen, more lower back discomfort, and odd pelvic twinges. On Sunday, I felt like my pelvic bones were so loose that I was hobbling around the house for a few hours! Last night, for fun, I timed my Braxton Hicks contractions, and they were averaging about seven minutes apart, but still very irregular. I do sometimes wonder if the full moon tomorrow will start up my labor! But I'm hoping baby waits until my mother-in-law, Mary Anne, arrives Saturday, and until Lynn, my doula, gets over her new cold!

Nurse also mentioned that baby appears to by laying in an optimal position, Right Occiput Anterior, where baby's back is on my right side. Here is a neat website showing baby's head in the pelvis (scroll down): Fetal Position within the Birth Canal. [Other info from the appointment: blood pressure nice and low at 104/66, I passed the Strep B test, so no need for antibiotics at birth, baby passed the NST as usual, and fluid level was 13.8.]

So I suddenly feel like the end is near! The book, What to Expect When You Are Expecting, says that in first time moms, labor usually follows about two to four weeks after baby drops. I would love for baby to arrive on November 19th! In the meantime, Tim and I are practicing my relaxation techniques, I sit on my yoga ball instead of a desk chair all day (to open up the pelvis and strengthen my legs), continue my prenatal yoga, and drink my pregnancy tea, all in an effort to have a very smooth delivery. Here's hoping!

Ilona's baby has arrived!

My neighbor Ilona had her baby on Sunday morning, on my mother's birthday! Edward Constantine was born at 4:40 a.m., weighing 8 lbs. 1 oz., and was 21 inches long. Ilona was in labor for 12 hours, with 2 hours of active pushing at the end. Mother and baby are healthy, and should be home as of today.

Tim and I had shown Ilona and her mother our nursery on Friday night, and I touched her belly and said, "This might be the last time I see you pregnant!" I was supposed to go over on Saturday afternoon to see their nursery, but she must have left for the hospital around the same time!

Congratulations to Ilona and George on the birth of their first son! (I checked the web nursery at St. Lukes online but they don't have any pictures of baby posted: Web Nursery.)

Baby shower in Missouri

On October 4, my friend and ninth cousin (!) Beverly Land cohosted a baby shower for us at her home in Parkville. Kimberly Mensch, a good friend from my golf club who had long ago offered to host a shower if we ever fostered a child, was the cohost. (Bev and I both do genealogy which is how we figured out our relationship. She is technically my only family who lives locally!)

The invitation list included my neighbors (and former one who flew in from New York!) and golfing friends. Quite a few who could not attend sent gifts. I was taken aback by everyone's generocity and thoughtfulness! Tim enjoyed looking at the gifts after I brought them home. I did bring in my mother-in-law's bassinet to use as a backdrop and gift holder, which worked out quite well.

The lovely gifts included Two handmade small quilts, Four boxed photo albums, Polka dotted sage crib skirt and sheets; Giraffe baby blankie, Sweet pea boppy, baby sign language set, breastmilk storage bags, breast flow bottles, "Guess How Much I Love You" book and soft matching rabbit, Chenille pastel baby blanket, "squeeze me" onesie, Irish pastel wool blanket, rosary beads, moo bib, peace signs onesie, silver feeding spoon, Wedgewood Beatrix Potter china set (bowl, plate, cup), Bathtub super scooper, sassy bath toys in bag, travel size Baby Johnson products, BRU gift card, Cowboys NFL bib autographed by Tony Romo, Jacksonville NFL bib autographed by Derrick Harvey, Peter Rabbit baby book, Beatrix Potter "wallies" cutouts, Hand woven pastel baby blanket (very soft and washable), 3-packs: bibs (I love grandma), too cute onesies, best of friends onesies, Gerber t-shirts; hat and sock set, playtex bottle liners, foam bath mat, Evenflo bottles, Bathtub, rubber ducky heat sensor, nasal aspirator, nail clipper with magnifying glass, and a High chair.

They served these absolutely delicious frosted sugar cookies -- and let me take home the extra! We also played a few games. The first one was to guess how many diapers were in a sturdy plastic case. Having purchased a few boxes of them over the past few weeks, I was closest at 150, which was probably an unfair advantage! In addition to getting to take this home as a gift, as a little prize Bev also gave me a "baby's first Christmas" ornament, the only one we've received! A second game was to match baby pictures to names, some of celebrities but mostly of the ladies present.

One of the guests was my next-door-neighbor, Ilona, who is due about three weeks before me. We did a belly comparison photo! At the time this photo was taken, I was at 32w2d, and Ilona was 35w0d.

I brought home with me a poster that Bev made that looked like a page from a November calendar. On it, the guests wrote their guesses for the baby's delivery date. So far, the guesses include November 11, 12, 14, 17, 22, 26 and 28. We shall see!

All in all, it was a wonderful shower filled with lots of beautiful blessings.

Halloween party

Tim and I were invited to a party at the home of a fellow member of the Kansas City Airport Rotary Club on Friday, October 24. I debated dressing up as Violet Beauregarde, the original girl from Willie Wonka who blew up into a giant blueberry after chewing gum at the Chocolate Factory. I had the perfect blue outfit and they were selling blue facepaint at our local Halloween store. But in the end, Tim and I decided to go dressed as the two main characters from the independent film, "Juno", that was released in 2007.

You will want to click on this to enlarge it:

We actually saw that movie while in our hotel room in Denver while I was on two day's bedrest after having little baby transferred inside! Tim enjoyed the irony of us dressing up as two high schoolers facing an accidental pregnancy.

So at the party, only a few people figured out the costumes. The cutest was the home owner's soon-to-be daughter-in-law who was afraid to come right out and ask if I was Juno. But when she asked what we were, she immediately said, "Oh I knew it. When we were leaving the house to pick up the pizza and you two walked by, I said, do you think that is Juno and Bleeker?" Others wondered if it was a real baby or a pillow.

The most infamous comment I got was, "Don't feel bad. I didn't wear a costume tonight either." Keep in mind this was a party at a nice home and everyone was either dressed in costume or dressed up. Did this complete stranger REALLY think I dressed so sloppily??! I had to laugh. I did carry a copy of the movie poster with me, taped inside my hoodie, to show the clueless.

The only bad part of the evening was the quantity of food that I ate: two Mexican "egg rolls", two shrimp cocktail, two mini crab cakes, handfuls of chips and Doritos and Cheetos, TONS of spinach dip with brown bread (then with my pizza crust), two slices of bacon pizza (mmmm), one slice of spicy chicken and garlic pizza, a slice of delicious pumpkin cake with cream cheese drizzle frosting, and a brownie. I drank Sprite all night. I paid the price for the debauchery by waking up at midnight with terrible heartburn. Three Rolaids later, I was surfing the net for homeopathic remedies. In the end, an apple eaten at midday finally quelled the pain!